Mid-Life Crisis?

Are you a 45 year-old Dentist with a poneytail, and a motorcylce?



Do you have a 22 year-old girlfriend, who is slowly fucking you to DEATH?



Hmm. You might be going through something known as a "Mid-Life Crisis".



Mid-Life Crisis



The effects of women's menopause are well known. Yet men often experience a major transition at mid-life as well. Questioning one's life can be disturbing, leading to major job changes or divorce. But mid-life crisis can also be a time for healthy changes that lead to a fulfilling middle and older age.



Symptoms



During his 40's, if a man or women has been hard-working, the fruits of their labors-a home and family, material possessions-will probably surround them. Then, before anything dramatic happens, small nagging doubts may appear, perhaps followed by a series of dramatic, apparently irrational events leading up to great change. During it all, men and women ask themselves questions such as: Is this all there is? Am I a failure? Symptoms and behaviors during mid-life crisis can range from mild to severe, including:




"I once scored four touchdowns in a single High School football game."



*boredom and exhaustion, or frantic energy



*self-questioning



*daydreaming



*irritability, unexpected anger



*acting on alcohol, drug, food, or other compulsions



*greatly decreased or increased sexual desire



*sexual affairs, especially with someone much younger



*greatly decreased or increased ambition.

(These symptons also apply to the condition I like to call the "Stoner Emotional Rollercoaster")



SilverSurfer9090: Pssh, fuckin' losers!



::25 years later, SilverSurfer9090 shoots himself in an empty bathtub, in his Mother's backyard::