My Physical Check-up

My Doctor got mad at me the other day when I went in for my physical check-up. He said it was time I had a Rectal exam. I forcefully disagreed. He said I was at risk for any kind of Colon Cancer, and all other kinds of butt diseases. So, I decided to let him "work his magic". I bent over the examination table, and tried to relax my "most tense muscle". I was trying to distract myself with thoughts of candy and gentle hugs, when I heard my Doctor make a sound of puzzlement. He rose to his feet, and tapped me on the shoulder. When I turned around, he was holding a Power Ranger, two rubber bands, and a map to his home, covered in vaseline. I quickly grabbed the items from his hands, and said in the most stoic voice I could muster, "I ran out of pockets this morning!" I was walking out of the exam room door, when I heard him say, "Asshole." That was the last time I let a man examine my anus...with consent, of course.