Man, I don't know! I used to be a machine, able to a write a full and enjoyable post in a mere matter of minutes. A picture of a retarded kid and a snappy one-liner, some story on the news about someone getting arrested for beastiality and my own insight about the love between man and beast, or just a short story about a boy having his period. All classic material, I haven't lived up to recently, in my own opinion. Lately, I haven't been on in days. I haven't even really tried to put anything new on here since Monday! I've become a mass of laziness, and a shell of my former glory. I've gotten fat and high off my fame and started wearing sequined jump suits, shooting out televisions with my gold plated revolvers (oh, wait that's Elvis. My bad).
This is the part where I make excuses for myself, if you don't want to hear my lame reasons for not updating, please skip this paragraph now. Now... my job lately has been insane! I work as a land surveyor (one of those morons on the side of the road looking through a telescope at another moron, and not someone who calls you at dinner asking you questions about how you feel about the President). I've been sent to small towns to do work on new waterline layouts, and to work locally on a construction site for a 26 story condo, which some of the construction workers say they wouldn't even walk in when it's done because of all the mistakes being made in the foundation (e-mail me if you ever stay in Panama City Beach, FL - so I can tell which hotel not to stay in). Not to mention, that I'm out of the town this weekend at my Sister-in-laws, where I don't have all my usual weapons of mass blogging at my disposal (I'm typing this at her house right now).
And on top of that, we have... THE HOLIDAYS!!! I love Thanksgiving and Christmas, but family will drive you crazy this time of year. My Mother-in-law actually gave my Wife her Christmas present to hang on to, and wrap for herself for Christmas (I wouldn't try to make sense of it or your head might explode). Plus the woman can't cook very well, but insists that we have Thanksgiving and Christmas dinner at her house, but my Wife (who CAN cook) will be preparing most of the food!
Oh GOD, in heaven... when I finally meet you face-to-face, you better have some answers!
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